I know you are emotionally exhausted. You are trying so, SO hard every moment of the day to reign in self-control, compassion, and patience- but it feels like your current relationship and/or environment is draining your reserves. You feel your body begging you to REST AND RESET but you don’t want to slow down because you fear the scary emotions you’re avoiding will all crash down on you at once and you will lose your momentum. And when you do get occasional opportunities to rest or “do nothing”, what do you do? You cram in as many chores as you can so you feel productive. That’s a pattern I am learning to overcome. When mental illness interrupts a relationship, it’s almost like losing that loved one. There is actual GRIEF involved-something I didn’t realize I was experiencing until way later. It’s not the affected person’s fault- they are just literally in a different world cognitively speaking. The things that YOU notice are lacking in your life or relationship, they don’t experience- and that in itself is HARD and SCARY, and feels very isolating. 

This is why your self-care has to be NUMERO UNO ladies. Because that intimate connection you used to rely on is not there anymore- you have to train your mind and heart to go to God for your comfort needs- otherwise, you are going to grow very frustrated, lonely, and resentful. I sure did- not even going to pretend like I handed it with perfect grace, but I’m learning. If you are resonating with this on every level, please please please hear me on this: YOU MUST RELEASE THIS SITUATION TO GOD, AND FOCUS ALL YOUR ENERGY ON GETTING YOURSELF BACK TO A HEALTHIER STATE. Think MINDSET, ROUTINE, NUTRITION, DAILY MOVEMENT. Those are the 4 pillars I want you to prioritize every single day. Why? Because straight up, each day is going to be different, but you can lead with a certain degree of structure and predictability if you commit to your self-care each day. Doesn’t mean it’s going to be perfect or feel easy (It’s not)- but it DOES mean that you can still process through this season and HAVE PEACE, ENERGY, AND JOY even when all around you seems dark. Also, if this situation or relationship doesn’t work out- YOU HAVE TO KEEP GOING! You cannot pin your motivation and worthiness to someone or a relationship, ladies. All of that has to be pinned to God. 

Look, I know it feels tough and it stings your heart- especially on the weekends when you have more time to think. But babe, listen, He knows. He hears, feels, and sees the pain you’re in and He has already called in a specific fleet of angels just for you. You are going to be uplifted, shielded, and guided through this entire process, ok? You are NOT alone- EVER.  Do not think about tomorrow, just focus on one hour at a time. When you start noticing the negativity creep in, just whisper: “Jesus, quiet my mind.” 

We are going to make it through today, ok?

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